Order Ideas with the Reader in Mind
Use organization to make your message clearer and more persuasive to your audience.
It’s tempting to offer information in the order that it occurred to you, but this usually isn’t the most persuasive or logical organization for readers. You probably arrived at the bottom line after a lot of thought, fact-finding, analysis, calculations, etc.
Business readers don’t want to see all that. They want to know the bottom line, then read about how you arrived there to make sure they agree with your reasoning.
Put things in the order that’s most persuasive to your reader. The order of ideas depends on
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What the reader cares about
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How you want the reader to react
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How you think the reader is likely to react
In workplace writing, use a direct pattern for positive or routine messages, and an indirect pattern for negative messages.
Use Effective Information Flow
The readability of your writing depends on clear information flow.
Documents, paragraphs, and sentences have effective information flow when they follow an “old” before “new” pattern. Begin with terms or concepts familiar to readers, and then introduce new ideas.
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What Constitutes Old Information?
Old information means ideas that are
- shared background information between author and reader;
- introduced earlier in the text;
- understood by readers from the context; and
- easily inferred from previous statements.
Example Sentence
Confusing: It is anticipated that the new policies governing laboratory health and safety will mean that an improvement of our test results will occur.
Clear: Our test results will improve because of the new health and safety policies. The policies involve…
Example Paragraph
Joseph Williams and Gregory Colomb, in Style: Lessons in Clarity and Grace (10th edition), model ineffective and effective information flow in the following passages:
Confusing and Awkward Information Flow (Begins with a Vague, Unfamiliar Concept)
Consistent ideas toward the beginnings of sentences, especially in their subjects, help readers understand what a passage is generally about. A sense of coherence arises when a sequence of topics comprises a narrow set of related ideas. But the context of each sentence is lost by seemingly random shifts of topics. Unfocused, even disorganized paragraphs result when that happens.
Effective Information Flow (Begins with a Familiar Concept)
Readers understand what a passage is generally about when they see consistent ideas toward the beginnings of sentences, especially in their subjects. They feel a passage is coherent when they read a sequence of topics that focuses on a narrow set of related ideas. But when topics seem to shift randomly, readers lose the context of each sentence. When that happens, they feel they are reading paragraphs that are unfocused and even disorganized.
Frontload the Main Point in Positive or Routine Messages
Most positive and routine messages should be direct, with key information frontloaded, so that readers understand your purpose immediately.
Organizing Direct Messages
- Start with the Main Point. If you are delivering good news, providing information, making a request, or announcing a meeting, put the essential information in the first sentence. This is particularly important now that so many readers look at email on their phones and even watches.
- Avoid Rote and Meaningless Openings. “I hope this message finds you well” is a cliché that obscures or delays your main point.
- Provide Necessary Details or Explanations in the Body of the Message. The body of your message is where you can provide additional information and explanation, depending on your purpose and audience.
- Create a Goodwill Closing. Express warmth and/or appreciation specific to the person you’re writing to. Sometimes you may also want to include contact information or next steps in your closing, but continue to keep the tone personable.
- Avoid Clichéd Closings. “Thank you for your time and consideration” is a stock phrase readers will skip over.
Use Business-Writing Paragraph Structure
Simple Messages
Business writing allows you to break up simple messages into multiple paragraphs for increased readability. If you can express an idea in one sentence, then a one-sentence paragraph is fine.
Start a new paragraph every time you have a new idea, a new subordinate idea, a new supporting detail, another example, or a new clarification.
The goal is whitespace; simply dividing one long paragraph into multiple short paragraphs adds whitespace, which makes messages easier to read.
Complex Messages
Students of academic writing often learn to structure long, complex paragraphs with the MEAL plan. In workplace writing, you can follow the same structure, but divide a long paragraph with a heading and short paragraphs.
Main idea = heading or sub-heading
Evidence = short paragraph(s)
Analysis = short paragraph(s)
Link to main purpose in writing, if necessary = short paragraph
Follow the Negative News Pattern for Bad News Messages
An indirect approach can soften bad news. Use the “negative news pattern” unless you are certain that your reader prefers a direct approach—you may recognize this pattern if you’ve ever received a standard rejection from a college or university admissions office.
Follow These Steps to Organize Bad News Messages
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Neutral Subject Line
Announce the topic of the message without giving away the bad news. Many readers won’t even open a message if the negative news is announced in the subject, which means you’ve lost an opportunity to explain your reasoning and repair relationships.
Buffer Statement
Begin the message with a positive or neutral statement. Be attentive to tone here; don’t create a jarringly upbeat opening to a negative message. The tone of your buffer statement and goodwill closing should be appropriate to the tone of the rest of the message.
Explanation
Prepare readers for the bad news and make it understandable and inevitable. It’s key for the explanation to come before the rejection, to force readers to read the explanation.
Bad News
Deliver the main point of the message without negative language (such as “unfortunately”) but clearly, so that there is no chance your reader will miss the news and require additional messages to clarify your position.
Optional: Alternative
If it’s appropriate to your audience and purpose, suggest an alternative to what you’re rejecting or saying no to.
Goodwill Closing
End pleasantly, to rebuild or reinforce the relationship, in spite of your negative message.
Note that this pattern is key when writing to someone in a position above you or to clients or customers; supervisors may not always take the time to use this pattern to say no to subordinates.
Choose an Organizational Strategy for your Main Ideas
Organizational Strategies
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General to Specific
Start with a broad idea, then provide an example.
Most to Least Important
Provide the most compelling details, reasons, or benefits first.
Chronological
Use this organizational pattern to document a process or explain a series of events.
By Category
Group and then order information according to category. For example, you might discuss manufacturing plants by region, or bank branches by type, or reports for each quarter.
Problem to Solution
Establish the problem, if necessary, and then detail the solutions. It usually makes sense to order the solutions from most to least important or relevant.